We don’t always realise that we can be violent with words, or be violent against self. The process of nonviolent communication (NVC) is intended to comply with all forms of life. It is to bring self and other not to act through fear of punishment, interest of the reward or guilt, but from the intention to understand and meet the needs of everyone. We can try to be appreciative of this friendly communication as much as possible during conflict: is what I intend to be connected with me and with the other with which I am in conflict for us to make life more beautiful. An example is: When you have crossed the street without looking, I was afraid and I need to take care of yourself. I ask you t-to stop each time at the pedestrian crossing and look right then left before crossing. The control of the process of Non-Violent Communication requires upstream work on the vocabulary of feelings and needs, as well as the ability to recognize a message which has a message that expresses a need. Print the list of feelings and the cut out in the shape of leaves tree (a sense corresponds to a sheet) These two trees represent the human: the first when the needs are satisfied, the second when the needs are not being met. You may write in the trunk of the first»When my needs are met»and in the trunk of the second»When my needs are not being met». Explain that all feelings serve to alert on the needs: the pleasant feelings in respect of needs satisfied, and the unpleasant feelings about the unmet needs (you can ask children questions:»How do you feel when your need to eat is satisfied.
Take a sheet at once: read the feeling that is written in it, engage a discussion on this feeling, the mimic, to refer to situations in which this feeling was experienced. Once this work on the vocabulary done, decide together when this feeling is experienced: when a need is satisfied, or when a need is unsatisfied. What examples in the past, or seen played in a story. Depending on the response, paste the leaf on a branch of the first tree, on a branch of the second tree. Allow the children to decorate, coloring, customize the sheets (for example, a color may be assigned to the emotions pleasant and other with unpleasant emotions and then degrade these colors according to the intensity of the feeling). This little game is to identify some of our needs, to assess the extent to which these are satisfied, and to see how to feed unfulfilled needs. I suggest you to download the maps of the needs resulting from the Non-Violent Communication (a few basic needs that drive us all): cards needs game CNV may play this game alone or with others, and draw as many cards as you want. Children (from six years) as well as adults can play: the children may be in need of explanations and of examples to clarify the meaning of certain needs. We need to recognize our unmet needs to communicate WITH others, not AGAINST the other: judgments, criticisms, diagnoses and interpretations on the other, are all expressions diverted from our needs. — Marshall Rosenberg Communicate with non-violent communication requires us to find the unmet need that hides behind each of our judgements, because the needs are the life seeking expression. From the moment people speak of their needs rather than the wrongs of others, it becomes much easier to find ways to satisfy everyone. — Marshall Rosenberg, We can train ourselves, like a game, trying to guess the needs to the origin of any message. This ability to discern the needs of others is of paramount importance in conflict resolution: Each message, regardless of its content or its form, is the expression of a need. — Marshall Rosenberg This game is inspired from the book Parents respectful kids respectful of Surah Hart and Victoria Kindle Hodson. Each participant gets the ears of a jackal and giraffe (to be printed in the book mentioned, to buy cv or putting hands in cone for the giraffe and his fists clenched for the jackal) A facilitator (preferably an adult who is aware of NVC) will be appointed and will explain the four ways to hear a message according to the Non-Violent Communication (NVC): The facilitator gives examples of language jackal and giraffe and the participants must put their ears to reflect the language used. For example: once this tour has been completed, the facilitator distributes the ears of a jackal to a person and the ears of a jackal to another. Each in their turn, the other participants speak a difficult message to hear (a judgment, a criticism, a reproach, in the language of jackal). The person who wears the ears of jackal responds first with the ears turned towards the other, and then with the ears turned towards itself. And then the person who wears the ears of the giraffe responds with the ears turned towards the other, and then with the ears turned towards itself. One can imagine other variants: all members wear the ears giraffes, and must respond in the language of giraffe to a message aggressive launched by the moderator you can invent a dialogue in which each speaker wears different ears (one not speaking that language jackal and the other only in the language of giraffe) or invent a dialogue in which each speaker carries the same ears (or jackal or giraffe) and then we can discuss the differences and results recorded according to the type of language used. These three little games lead to small (from six to seven years), and great to practice NVC. They can be offered in the classroom and at home to awaken the children and adolescents non-violent communication, family or even in business. To go further, the book is Parent-friendly, child-friendly (editions La Découverte) offers many other games to practice with children to raise awareness about non-violent communication. Excellent site very useful for my tasks of head of Department Parenting.
Thank you for all these ideas
You should check with the French association for Non-Violent Communication. Otherwise, there are templates to cut out in the book that I mention in the article. It is possible to recover the spikes of these steps and dedicate a place of the classroom or the home to this space for clarification of what is happening in the us. The adults as well as children could go when they feel overwhelmed by their strong emotions and they need a break to focus on their emotions and their needs. Free: three games to familiarize themselves with the Communication, Not Violent in family